The Art of Running Errands

Transforming your tasks into chic little adventures.

On any given day, I have very little to do. The nature of my work — freelance writer, agency contractor, niche gay internet micro It Woman, aspiring novelist — and the cadence with which I complete it — short frantic bursts of productivity — means that I have a lot of time on my hands. I use that time in many unproductive ways: scrolling TikTok, shopping online, reading Legolas/Gimli fanfic, playing Witcher 3 on my Switch, writing Legolas/Gimli fanfic, watching YouTube video essays about the construction of Victorian clothing, and refusing to descale my Nespresso.

But my favorite way to spend my free time is running errands. Running an errand fills me with a sense of purpose. I’m not a friendless loser with no plans, I’m a busy cosmopolitan woman who has shit to do! “I spent the weekend having tons of sex with my partner and making meaningful connections with new people. What did you do,” a friend might ask me. “Oh,” I’ll reply, shrugging nonchalantly so my cashmere sweater slips coquettishly off one shoulder, “I was running errands.”

Through years of trial of error, I have elevated the act of leaving my apartment to buy something, pick something up, or drop something off into an art form. Errands for me are almost like rituals, transmuting my empty hours into chic little adventures.

Below are some of my favorite errands to run, with tips on how to elevate the experience from a menial task to a glamorous sojourn.

Getting a coffee
Barely an errand, but often my only excuse to put on something that isn’t sweatpants in the winter. If only there was a cute barista at my local coffee shop…

Grocery shopping
I go grocery shopping basically every day. When I lived in Los Angeles, it made more sense to do a weekly shopping trip where I loaded my car up with everything I’d need. I didn’t even have to bring everything inside! I could leave 8-packs of paper towels in my trunk for weeks if it struck my fancy. But living in a walkable city like New York means that anything you buy, you have to carry home, and I’m sorry but pushing a granny cart full of groceries is not part of my fantasy. So I buy what I need as I need it, filling my Sandy Liang Baggu tote or pink Glossier market bag with a few items at a time. I’m a regular patron of no fewer than three different grocery stores: one where I get my generic staples, one where I get my name-brand needs and good meat/produce, and one where I buy stupid snacks I don’t need. Somehow I always manage to leave without the one thing I actually need for whatever I’m cooking that day and end up ordering DoorDash. It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey!

Farmer’s Market
I had to make this its own entry separate from grocery shopping because the farmer’s market isn’t just an errand, it’s an event. Most Saturday mornings you will find me at the Fort Greene Farmer’s Market, dodging children and dogs (leave them at home!) to peruse the stalls. My friend Peyton and I will often meet for coffee first, braving the seemingly neverending line at Bittersweet for maple oat lattes before crossing the street to Fort Greene Park. If it’s a good Saturday the pickle stand will be there and I’ll take home a quart of bright green half sours (I like my pickles as close to cucumbers as possible). If I’m feeling myself I’ll stop at the vintage silver jewelry stall and pick up a pair of earrings or a charm necklace. Some weeks, when work or depression or The Gilded Age not airing has me down, the knowledge that by the weekend I’ll be at the market is the only thing that keeps me going.

Shipping
The only errand I haven’t been able to make fun is dropping off packages to be shipped. The only way I’ve been able to make it even tolerable is by storing up anything I need to send out (mostly returns and the occasional Depop order) until I have a huge reusable bag full and bringing it to my local mailing store all at once, where a very lovely woman prints all the labels and boxes everything up. I do tend to leave with a little spring in my step, happy to finally have that done with and feeling like I’ve somehow made money, which is further proof of my brain damage.

Picking up dry cleaning
Without a doubt, the cuntiest errand to run and it’s not even close. To clarify: dropping your dry cleaning off is a thankless chore, but picking it up is chic as fuck. Sometimes I’ll let other errands accumulate and complete them all at once, but dry cleaning must be its own separate occasion. There is nothing more quintessentially New York City than walking down a street with your fresh dry cleaning draped over an arm or slung over your shoulder. I like to dress up in a cute outfit, put on a lip, and style my hair down so that it flows out behind me as I sashay home with my garments. That being said, once you get home dry cleaning is so annoying to deal with, all that unpinning it from the hangers which you then have to dispose of. (If you keep the wire dry cleaning hangers…seek treatment.) If I could afford it, I’d dry clean every item of clothing I own.

I hope you have a fantastic weekend full of silly little errands!